Social Gracious

The Tubal Ligation Vacation

I am at about that age when birth control pills begin to come with a black box warning.  So, if I take them, reportedly I am at a higher risk of having a clotted leg that will have to be removed, or my head will explode in a ghastly way.  Because of this, UberGeek and I have begun the earnest discussion of what to do in order to prevent the creation of any new Divas or Eddies. 

If things had been just a little different, this all would have been solved when Diva and Eddie were born.  Although I planned for a natural childbirth, I informed my OB that should things not work out, and he had to give me a c-section, he was to go ahead and tie the old tubes in a BIG FAT knot.  He gave me a kind look, the sort he probably gives to all of his crazy, hormone addled, 8 months pregnant with twins patients, and told me, "Kristie, you are so young, let's just wait until the time comes, you might change your mind."  That is when I grabbed him by the collar, pulled him so close to me that he could smell the frozen cream puffs on my breath, and told him that if he didn't do it I would take hold of the sterile tubing and do it myself.  I'm making that part up, actually, but it did happen in my mind. In reality, I just smiled at him and said, "OK, but I am telling you, I do not ever want to be pregnant again."  "There are other options" he replied calmly.

Now my children are five, and although I would like one more child, I am still very sure that I do not want to be pregnant again.  I had enough complications to last for a lifetime the first pregnancy, and I am not willing to roll the dice again; it's not fair to Eddie or Diva.  Recently, I approached UberGeek about making things permanent.  Among his close counterparts, he is one of the "Last of the Mohicans" so to speak, the few unclipped.  Whenever I mention the prospect of a vasectomy, UberGeek's eyes get wide, then I can tell that his mind starts churning, and this is what he comes up with, "I'm not getting one of those, they don't work." 

UberGeek is of course referring to a friend who got a vasectomy from a prominent urologist.  The man has super sperm; this is a couple who can stand too close to each other on a wet floor, then she gets pregnant.  He had the vasectomy; they didn't quite get the final count back, and welcomed a final child to their beautiful family.  He had to get the procedure performed a second time, reportedly this is the only similar case in the surgeon's career.  

We, on the other hand, are not that couple, but it is a good excuse for UberGeek.  After a year of attempting to convince him that a vasectomy would be in everyone's best interest, I told him I would get a tubal ligation.  I have vague memories of people getting them years ago, days were spent recuperating, and so I let UberGeek know that it would be a long recovery.  I had visions of a couple days at the beautiful new Mayo Clinic hospital with a flat screen TV, IV drugs, clean sheets, my own nurse and a lot of magazines.  This would be followed by a couple days of quiet time at home while the kids were off at school. 

Off I went to see my primary care physician, who I have known for ten years.  I told him that UberGeek, who is also his patient, was being stubborn about the vasectomy and that I was thinking of a tubal.  I wanted to know how much of a recovery at Mayo I would get.  He laughed, then said, "Seriously Kristie? We replace portions of people's intestines as an outpatient procedure, you are so not getting any time in the hospital; it's an outpatient procedure." 

Outpatient is a whole different ballgame.  Outpatient means I will return home after something painful and have to slog around trying to keep the house tidy, wash the dishes, answer questions, fold laundry and watch tumbleweeds of animal hair go by.  I won't want to let it all pile up for a couple days while I relax and recover.  UberGeek will be wound tight trying to keep the kids busy; there won't be anyone to wait on me, so I will attempt to do too much too soon.  I know how it will go.  It's much better that he get the vasectomy because I am better equipped to wait on him and the kids all at once; women are better at multitasking, at least in this family.

There will be no tubal ligation vacation, time to pursue other options.

Hey, Dummy, Are You Listening? It's Me, God

  At my office, there are very few people with young children, hence, when 5:00 rolls around the place is still humming with activity.  I typically try to come in by 8 and leave around 5 or come in at 730 and leave around 430 or so.  My office mates tend to come in later and leave later.  This doesn't generally work for me because my kids want to eat dinner by 6 and go to bed at 730.  If I leave at exactly 5, get home at 530, then I can get dinner on the table by 6 and we can spend an hour together before they go to bed.  If I stay later, I am taking time from the kids so I'd rather log in later from home after they are in bed if I need to.  Still, I always feel as if there is a contest to see who can sit at their desk the latest in the evenings at the office.  I am forever getting these reminder calls from UberGeek at 5:05 inquiring as to whether I have departed, then 5:10, then 5:15.  He usually leaves around 4:30 from work as his office is a ghost town by 5.  UberGeek is always on me to just come on home to be with them.  Still, I feel weird heading off down the hallway when everyone else sits fixed in front of their terminals.

Sometimes God speaks to you, but in my case, apparently God has to repeat the message, more than once.  When I was in my early twenties my stepmother, Lynn, died of cancer at the age of 44.  At the time, both of her biological children, my brother and sister, were under the age of six.  Before they were born, Lynn's work was everything to her, she was published in a number of academic journals, loved teaching, lecturing and traveling.  I still remember the assorted lab frogs living on the back porch during the summer.  Once my brother and sister were born, work was no longer everything to Lynnie, and she simply would not commit her time in a way she once had.  She was still a very passionate person about nursing, about biology and about research, she simply could not give it twenty four hours a day as she had for nearly fifteen years. 

In hindsight, it was a good thing Lynnie was so dedicated to her family, she certainly didn't know she would be given so little time with them.  I remember not long after her terminal cancer diagnosis she said to me, "Kristie, this will be the thing that kills me, but I want the treatment to give me more time.  I can't die yet, the kids are just too little."  They were too little; when I think about it now, it crushes my heart to know what that did to her, having to leave them without a choice.  The treatment did buy her more time, she was given a prognosis of a few months and she lived about a year.

I am 35 years old, nine years younger than my stepmother when she died.  My children are the age that her oldest child was when she died.  Although I often miss her, and I ache for my brother and sister, I also realize that I learned one of the most beautiful lessons in my life from her.  Today, I was editing a website at work and I came across this quote from Stephen Covey, "Most people struggle with life balance simply because they haven't really paid the price to decide what is really important to them."   I was around to watch that price be paid.  As I read that quote, I started reflecting; I have been given a similar message in several different ways, from several sources lately, so perhaps my ear should be perking up.

A couple weekends ago, I was in church and the focus of the sermon was Psalm 39:4, "Show me, O Lord, my life's end and the number of my days; let me know how fleeting is my life."  The pastor continued to talk about the power of that reading, that our days are numbered, that we only get one chance, one chance to be a child, one chance to be a teen, one chance to be a young adult, there is no going back. "You have made my days but a hands breadth; the span of my years is as nothing before you. Each man's life, is but a breath."  I could feel emotion well up inside me as I squeezed UberGeek's hand as he sat next to me in the pew.  OK God, I'm listening; be patient with me, sometimes I'm a slow learner.

Cooking Oatmeal in Your Rice Cooker

If you are similar to our family at all there are days when it is pretty difficult to break out of the cereal in a box or cereal bar rut morning after morning.  Luckily, someone told me about being employed at Quaker oatmeal, where you can get hot Quaker oats at any time of the day, courtesy of the staff cafeteria.  The way they work this magic is to cook the oatmeal in giant rice cookers, brilliant!

Sure enough, throw in the oats and water as directed on the back of the Quaker box, turn on your rice cooker and wait for the beep some 20-30 minutes later and you will be the recipient of perfect oatmeal.  I do recommend making more than one serving; I usually make enough to bring it to work for myself and a friend, or for Diva and I to sit down and enjoy.

Add ins make it even yummier, cut up an apple in pieces, sprinkle some cinnamon, a little brown sugar and let all of that cook with the oatmeal in the cooker.  It will all be just right when the timer goes off.  Slice a banana, sprinkle in some chopped walnuts, cinnamon and maple syrup and you have banana bread oatmeal ready in no time.

Make sure to invest in a rice cooker with a delay timer.  This allows you to throw in your oatmeal and water the night before, select the number of hours you want the cooker to turn on in, and then go to bed.  You will awake to a delicious, healthy breakfast. 

What suggestions do you have for making fast, healthy meals for busy families?

The Breast Cancer Marathon, With Love

 

Marathon weekend was a full one, Friday I headed to the Health and Fitness Expo to pick up my race packet with my friend and running buddy, 1.0.  There were loads of great exhibitors, fun freebies and it was the perfect start to a great weekend. We decided that we would bring the kids back the next day for the pep rally and make a day of it.

Saturday we headed downtown and arrived just in time for the pep rally.  The kids scooped up some free tambourines and pom poms and Diva was jumping up and down, cheering and shaking pom poms.  Eddie asked us if we could maybe not be so loud; I think he was embarassed.  1.0 soon arrived with her husband, Wallace, and kids 2.0 and 3.0 plus the child of a friend and neighbor she was keeping an eye on for the day; we were quite a motley crew.  With the extra kids though we scored lots of freebies and they were thrilled that Winn Dixie was giving away boxes of raisins, Smoothie King had free smoothies and Diva discovered her favorite cheese, Cabot, was giving away samples.  After an hour or so the kids had had quite enough so we headed down to the Jacksonville Landing to let them run around.   Finally, it was home to relax and get ready for the big race. 

That evening I laid out all my clothes, shoes and got my water ready.  Then I moved the coffee machine and rice cooker into UberGeek and I's bathroom so their beeps in the morning wouldn't wake up the kids.  I measured out the oatmeal, the water and put in a little cinnamon and brown sugar then set the delay timer.  Then I made the coffee and double checked that timer too.  I barely drink any of my coffee before a run longer than 18 miles or so but the few sips I take are kind of a mental crutch.  Once everything was packed, checked and double checked I drank a big glass of water and headed to bed.  I know lots of people say they either don't sleep, or don't sleep well before  a big race, but I always sleep like a baby.  I figure I'm not a contender to place, so the worst thing that could happen to me is that they have to pick me up in one of those wagons and I make it to the end anyhow.

5 in the morning came quickly and I jumped out of bed to get dressed and pack up the oatmeal and coffee.  I was ready in no time and got the text that Superfuzz was on the way to pick me up.  Since she just had a baby a few weeks ago she decided to sit this marathon out.  Thankfully she did volunteer to drive 1.0 and I to the race and drop us off, so off we went.

Once we got to the race location I really started to get excited.  1.0 wanted to know if we would find all the members of our group.  I knew not to worry since we meet at the same spot each year, but I remember how worried I was the first year, 26 miles is a long way to run without the support of the dear friends you have trained with.  No worries though, all the usual suspects started to arrive. 

We made small talk at the start and marveled at how well organized everything was.  Port o potties as far as the eye can see, this is a runners dream, let me tell you.  There is nothing worse than needing to line up for a race and yet having to wait in an unending line because a race director has not ordered enough port o lets.  There have  been a few races I have had to use the woods or have almost been late too simply because there were not enough places to "go".  Not at the Breast Cancer Marathon, there are even hand washing stations with real water!  Free coffee for participants and spectators, fruit, snacks, everything you could ever want. 

 

Then it was time for the national anthem and the official race song, Believe in the Beat which trust me, is still stuck in my head!  We all started jumping up and down with excitement and then the gun went off; it was time to go.  The crowd carried us the first few miles over the intracoastal bridge, once we got down to the Jacksonville Beach neighborhoods it was hard to hold back speed due to the overwhelming emotion of the spectators; it is indescribable.  Then we headed out to run a stretch on the hard packed sand on the beach before moving toward Atlantic Beach and on to Selva Marina.  Each neighborhood was lined with spectators. 

 
 The best part was having our own personal cheering section.  UberGeek and Wallace stuffed all the collective kids into our minivan with UberGeek at the helm and went from place to place cheering us on.  Just seeing them was amazing.  Usually UberGeek is at home with the kids, or running the same races I am, so I've never had anyone at a race cheering for me; it was an amazing experience. 

Around mile 15 I had a little trouble; it was pretty hot on marathon day.  Not hot by sitting around, or tooling about town standards, for that it was perfect.  The temperature was about 70 degrees, unfortunately, that is really hot for a marathon when you are in full sunlight and running on asphalt without stopping for hours on end.  All of a sudden, I felt as if the blood had drained out of my face and I became nauseated.  I asked my group to go on ahead of me since I was costing them time and I had my cell phone.  I bent over under a tree and tossed a few cookies, then I sat down in the cool shade.  I thought about calling UberGeek and telling him to come get me; I have never quit a race, ever.  Then I thought of Janis, whose name was on my back; I was running the race in her honor, Janis was recently diagnosed with a relatively rare breast cancer.  I thought about the many survivors we have in our training group and their enthusiasm for enjoying every mile of the race.  I stood up.  I decided that I might be hot, and I might not feel the greatest, this might not be a great race in terms of time on the clock.  Still, it would be a great race, if not a particularly fast one for me.  I was going to finish.  From then on, it wasn't bad at all, I actually slowed down a bit and focused on enjoying the spectators, my run and the distance.  I came upon my own personal cheering section one more time, and that gave me an extra dose of oomph.  When I came up over the bridge on the last mile I saw one of my training group's leaders whose knee had been in pain, our other group leader had run back after finishing the race to meet up with her.  I was so happy to see them after so many miles on my own; I started yelling their names.  I managed a final tiny burst of speed to cross the finish line with my fists in the air, pumping, full of joy, happy to be alive, and finished.

My kiddos and UberGeek were there waiting for me, with 1.0 and her family.  The lady handing out the marathon medals let Eddie Haskell put my medal over my head.  You would have thought it was made of pure gold to see how happy that made him.  Then I grabbed a couple waters to share with the kids and we hobbled towards the finish line celebration area.

Only 347 days until the next 26.2 Donna, The National Marathon to Finish Breast Cancer!

 

 

It's a Good Thing She's Not an Octopus

My in laws are practical people, when someone needs help, you help them, when something is broke, you fix it. My mother in law's knees, damaged by arthritis, had been bothering her for some time, and she made the decision that it was time to do something about it, simple as that.  One nice thing about my husband's family, UberGeek included, is that they are very positive in their focus.  They assess things, research their options and move forward, ready to implement their plan.  

My in laws researched the candidates for knee surgeons  and decided on Dr. Mary O'Connor at the Mayo Clinic.  We are lucky to have Dr. O'Connor, one of the best surgeons in her field, right here in Jacksonville.  Dr. O'Connor recommended the Brooks Total Joint Rehabilitation program for rehabilitation, and it was time to schedule the first knee. 

MIL decided on a few days before Thanksgiving for the first knee replacement.  The second knee was optimistically scheduled for Valentines, keeping up with the tradition of scheduling things around a holiday.  When people heard me say that my seventy something year old MIL was getting two knee replacements in three months, mostly they issued dire warnings. "She'll never get the second one done, the first one will be so painful." "Most people never keep up with the rehab, they don't rehab the knee properly." "The new knee won't ever work right." I listened and worried about my MIL endlessly, asking UberGeek what he thought.  Typically, he replied, "She has the best surgeon and my dad will make her do the rehab, she'll be fine."

The first surgery went as planned with a short recovery at her suite in the Mayo Hospital, then she was off to rehab at Brooks.  There they put her through the paces with rehab every day, several times a day.  She was amazed by all the different things the therapists had her do, and how her range of motion changed day by day.  MIL couldn't believe anyone would get a joint replacement and go straight home from the hospital without a stay at rehab.  After two weeks at the total joint rehabilitation program, she was discharged and continued her therapy three times a week at a Brooks outpatient clinic, with my father in law closely supervising. 

Tonight I went to visit my mother in law in the hospital where she is recovering after having the second knee replaced.  As my father in law said, "It's a good thing she's not an octopus."  She looked great and was in good spirits; for a hospital room, she had pretty nice digs.  So I'll just say the thing that gives UberGeek the most satisfaction in life, "You were right" and this is one time I'm happy to let him say "I told you so."

The Heartburn Diet

This was a tough week, for a couple reasons, but in general, I wasn't expecting it to be complicated by a digestive condition I have not experienced since I was nine months pregnant with twins who crowded most of my vital and not so vital organs.  Friday, Web Warrior Princess, UberGeek and I hit Tommy's for pizza. The Princess and I ordered a gluten free  pizza with pepperoni, olives and mushrooms, I couldn't wait to dig in! Since she has celiac disease, there aren't that many spots to enjoy pizza. UberGeek ordered a slice of regular pizza with pepperoni.

We were chatting away, and I was enjoying the company; I usually bring lunch so it was nice to be out of the office.  Our pizza was delivered and we dug into the steaming slices.  I have to say that this crust was amazing, and just like any other pizza, except maybe a little crisper. Although it was delicious, after just a few bites, I felt uncomfortably full. I was really hungry and it was very good, so I managed to eat two pieces anyway.  My lack of gusto delighted Web Warrior Princess who managed to down the rest of our tiny pizza. Then, my stomach started to ache, although it was not too painful.  We finished our pizza and dashed out into the rain to finish the workday.

That evening UberGeek decided to make breakfast for dinner, waffles and bacon.  I took a few bites and the pain was unbearable, as if fire was shooting through me.  I couldn't even finish my pecan waffle and slice of bacon. UberGeek's waffles are heavenly and I was desperate to eat mine, and hungry and I just couldn't eat it.  I was doubled over at the table and UberGeek had to dash out to the Walgreens to pick up a selection of products that promised to relieve my pain; I consumed them with gusto.

All day today I have been desperate to eat, but each bite is agony. I made the family buttermilk pancakes with chocolate chips and couldn't eat them myself, it was devastating. The fact that I have a marathon coming up in a week worries me even more.  This is not a good time for me not to be able to eat what I need to eat. UberGeek has tried several times to suggest the Emergency Department at nearby Mayo Clinic, but the thought of walking in a place meant for Emergencies when I have heartburn is mortifying.  I think I'll wait until Monday and see my primary care doctor.  Until then, Gaviscon, Zantac and I are very close friends.

Chocolate Covered Strawberries Recipe

Many of us are on a budget this Valentine's Day.  If you want to make your sweetheart swoon without pinching your wallet here is a fast way to their heart!  If you are a man you get extra points for doing something that looks fancy in the kitchen.  Not to mention, there is something romantic about juicy fruit covered in rich dark chocolate.  My kids also really dig this recipe.

2 pints strawberries
1.5 cups semi sweet chocolate chips
(I use Sunspire Organic 65% Cacao bittersweet, amazing flavor and I stock up when there is a coupon from Mambo Sprouts) 
3 tbs corn syrup
6 tbs butter
1 tbs Chambord or Grand Marnier liqueur if desired to add flavor and depth

Rinse strawberries and set aside on dish towel until they are dry and room temperature. Mix all ingredients except strawberries in a heavy sauce pan or double boiler and melt on low, stirring frequently with metal whisk.  When all ingredients are melted and mixed dip strawberries one by one into chocolate mixture then place on wax paper to set up.  I use individual foil or wax cupcake liners for each strawberries which makes them easier to serve and transport.  Place the strawberries in the freezer for about five minutes to harden chocolate, then store in refrigerator until ready to serve.

Download Recipe for Kristie's Chocolate Dipped Strawberries

Enjoy these with love!

A Fish Story

About a year ago, we bought two fish for the kiddos.  Like all low rent fish who are not cared for by people who have a certain yen for the care of creatures that dwell in aquariums, they eventually died.  The first to succumb was Diva’s fish, who she named Hannahbelle.  I noticed the lady Hannahbelle floating belly up in the little tank late in the evening, and alerted UberGeek to our plight.  Then I grabbed the little green handled scoop and “fished” her out.  We gave the fish an unceremonial flushing and bid her farewell while she circled the drain.  I told UberGeek I would talk to Diva in the morning about the demise of her fish; that’s not his thing. 

In the morning, as I was showering, a terrible thing happened; Diva woke up and noticed the fish was gone.  She approached UberGeek, and he panicked. UberGeek said the first thing that came to his mind, “Hannahbelle went on vacation!  She wanted to see the world like Nemo.”  UberGeek was thinking to himself that he would replace the ill fated Hannahbelle with a similar fish and save his daughter the heartache.  She would never know the difference, right?

Time went by as it does, grocery lists lengthened, laundry loads hummed, until finally over a year had passed.  The lovely Hannahbelle, despite all the good intentions, was never replaced.  Recently, we were out shopping at Wally World picking up some necessities when the kids begged to pass by the pet supplies area.  As we walked past the tanks Diva began to sniffle, “I miss Hannahbelle, she went on vacation a long, long time ago and she never came back. Daddy, where is Hannahbelle?”

Eddie turned to look at his sister with a very serious look on his face, “Diva, that fish is dead and it’s never coming back!  Fish don’t go on vacation.”

I suppose Santa Claus is next.

26 Miles for the Breast Cancer Marathon

 

Friday night the coffee machine was in my bathroom with the rice cooker full of oatmeal, both set to come on at 415 AM; my running clothes were set out in the closet.  All this was in anticipation of my last long training run before the National Marathon to Fight Breast Cancer, the 26.2 with Donna.  This is the third year I've been involved with this marathon so you think I'd be used to long runs.  Still, earlier in the week my running pal, 1.0,  and I began the bargaining, "what if we only ran 22 on Saturday, we'd still be prepared."  When I woke up yesterday morning I thought, "If 1.0 sleeps in, maybe I will just not make it to this run, maybe the half marathon will be enough for me this year."  I know that's crazy since I've made it to this point, but there's a lot you can say to yourself at 4AM when the alarm goes off.

1.0 made it to my house and we grumbled, groaned, ate our oatmeal out of styrofoam cups and headed out toward the run.  I sipped on my coffee, more as a crutch than anything since I don't actually drink much of it before a long run. We chatted and slowly I began to wake up.

We got out to the Baldwin Rail Trail and our group, Forward Motion, started out on the trail along with all the other Galloway Training Groups.  It was dark but the conversation picked up quickly.  We are a small group of mostly women and one brave man.  Water stops every two miles and a bathroom break at mile six made the first 13 miles go by really quickly, then we turned around to head back.  Our group leaders as well as several group members had run the Disney marathon the weekend before.  Some group members who had just ran the marathon cut the distance short a bit, understandably. Our group leaders followed us on a bike, running half the distance then switching to the single bike they shared; it meant a lot to me to have them out there with us.

Truthfully, this was one of my favorite long distance runs ever, the weather was perfect, the company was good, and I was not injured or feeling unwell.  The last five miles or so the group told embarassing or entertaining stories about our lives to pass the time and the miles rolled on by.  I won't say it was easy, because no 26 mile run is a cakewalk but it was definitely one of the better ones.  Whenever I have a tough time running I think of the breast cancer survivors who train with us, and I say to myself, if they can do it so can I.  I run because there have been times when I have not been able to, and there are so many people who aren't able to now, and there will be times in the future when I will not be able to again, but for now, I run.

As we approached the finish line for the run we noticed an arch of pink balloons and the running ribbon that is the symbol for the marathon.  It just filled my heart with joy and gave me that last push to run in together with my group members.  We took some group pictures, said goodbye to friends, pulled on clean shirts and headed out to share a celebratory cheeseburger. 

When I got home, I said hello to everyone then headed for the tub and the ice bath that hurts so  
 good.  I hate the ice bath, but it really saves my knees and muscles from feeling sore the day after a long run.  I eased into a tub full of cool water, wrapped in a polar fleece with a toboggan on my head. UberGeek slowly added ice to the water until it was frigid and I couldn't feel my limbs.  When I couldn't take it anymore, I got out and took the best hot shower ever.  As I was drying off I noticed that the bathroom was clean, really clean.  I threw on some clothes and looked around the rest of the house and the whole thing was spotless.  UberGeek and I put the kids in their rooms for quiet time and it was time for a nap.

My life is good, really, really good.

Step Away from the Quarters Diva

The kiddos go to a little yellow school not too far from our house. Each Tuesday, we do our best to remember their chapel money.  This is when we scrounge around our pockets, wallets, bureau tops and desks for various silver money to send to school with them as an offering.  Vaguely, I remember that it goes to some sort of charitable endeavor, but mostly it's another thing to cross of the list on Tuesday mornings.

Last week, as you all know, a terrible earthquake struck Haiti and UberGeek and I struggled with what we would tell the kids about it.  We explained that an earthquake had happened to a country not too far from us in Florida, called Haiti, and that many people now did not have a home or food.  Imagine our surprise when Diva and Eddie looked at us like we were the dumbest people they had ever seen.  "Mama, we know where Haiti is; that's where our chapel money goes.  The kids there don't have enough to eat and we send all our chapel money for food and clothes and stuff they need." Um, duh.

Eddie seemed to really reflect on the news of the earthquake, he looked at me and said, "Mama, so now they don't have any house to go to? No food? No toys?"  It was so hard to tell him the truth and yet so important.

We told Diva and Eddie that our family would be sending some money to Haiti to help the people there.  Since the kiddos have change jars stuffed with their allowance, and their money is divided into save/spend/give,  I reminded them that if they wanted to we could go ahead and count out their funds.  They could choose any charity they wanted for their gift, including Haiti.  Both decided that was a good idea.

UberGeek proceeded to count out all of their dough.  They each came out to close to $30 so he rounded them both up to $30.  Then, he did his best to explain the percentages for save/spend/give.  Typically it is 60 save 20 give 20 spend.  UberGeek wanted them to really understand breaking up their money this time and they weren't getting it.  So, he gave them each 10 quarters. 

He asked Eddie, if he had ten quarters how many of those he would keep and how many he would donate.  Eddie pushed forward six quarters.  "Great," said UberGeek, "you will keep six and give four to Haiti?" "No!" Eddie said, "I will give six to Haiti and keep four, Daddy, they don't have any food!"  UberGeek complimented him on his generosity and moved on to Diva.  Diva looked at the shiny silver money and pushed forward two quarters. "Diva!" said UberGeek, "that's very generous, you want to give eight quarters to Haiti and only keep two?" "No, Daddy, don't be silly" she said, "two for Haiti and the rest are for me." UberGeek struggled to keep from laughing then looked at her seriously and reminded Diva that the people in Haiti didn't have anything to eat, or houses to live in.  She gave him a dirty look and pushed forward two more quarters.